The Life and Times of Florence Knitingale

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Guess Who Won?

I had some time to kill before Knit for Life last night, so I decided to do a little window shopping. And, as everyone with a child--either inner or outer--knows, "window shopping" refers to the art of wandering around a store pretending that you aren't going to buy anything, and then your child harasses you until you do and you pretend it was a well-thought out decision. That's what it means in my world, in any case. (It may be for the best that I don't have any flesh and blood children.)

While I was window shopping, I just happened to end up in the handbag section, where there just happened to be a sale on (this time it was JC Penney--I think the stores are conspiring against me...I'm sure the fact that it was Labor Day and every store in the country was having a sale was mere coincidence). The conversation went sort of like this:

Mature, outer adult me: "Aren't they lovely? Now, we're just looking. We really don't need a bag right now."

Spoiled brat inner child: "Yes, I do. I NEED a bag. I REALLY REALLY need one! One of these!!"

Me: "Oh, dear. Not that one. That's much too loud and garish. Besides, you have a perfectly good bag."

Inner brat: "I don't LIKE my bag. It's icky. I want this pretty one."

Me: "It most certainly is not icky, and you liked it just fine before. But okay. We can consider a new purse. But let's start with these lovely, classic bags over here."

Inner brat: "Don't WANT a classic bag. I want THIS ONE!!"

Me: "Shhhh! Stop wailing like that! That's no way to get what you want! And I'm sorry, but young ladies do not carry handbags made of red, faux crocodile. It's cheap and tacky. Here, try this lovely chocolate leather bag. It has lots of pockets and a sensible shoulder strap."

Inner brat: "I HATE that leather purse! And it's not chocolate--chocolate is good. I want this one. Don't care what young ladies do. I want it!"

Me: (somewhat desperately) "Look, it's not at all what a mature woman would carry! It''s...RED, for heaven's sake! Okay, I'll tell you what. If you really must have red, how about this lovely leather satchel in a sort of burgandy. It's kind of red."

Inner brat: "IT IS NOT!!!! It's NOT red and I don't like it and you're icky and I hate you!! I want the red purse!"

Me: "But a red purse won't go with anything! And it's not even very big. Where will you put everything? For pete's sake--put it down!"

Inner Brat: "I WON'T put it down. IWON'TIWON'TIWON'T!!! And you can't make me!!"

Me: (now attempting to wrestle the purse from her grasping little hands) "But look--it's not even real anything. Feel how nice and soft the real leather purses are."

Inner Brat: "Don't care. Don't want the icky old leather."

Me: "Well...but I'll bet it's ridiculously expensive, and I won't pay that kind of money for dead urethane hide, do you hear me?"

Inner Brat: "It's on sale. It's 50% off. Look how smooth and shiny it is. Here, just kind of pet it."

Me: ".......oh, man. I hate you. I really hate you."

Inner Brat: "I get the purse, though--right?"

Which is how I came to be the owner of this completely fabulous and probably horrid red faux croc handbag, which I love even as I hate myself for loving it. For the record, I'm not at all sure whether I wanted a red, faux croc handbag, or just wanted to be the sort of woman who would carry a red, faux croc handbag and get away with it. Luckily, I'm now equipped to experiment and find out. (the photo makes it look kind of's not. It's really very red.)

By the way, anyone willing to let my inner child vacation at their house? Just for a couple of weeks? I fear it's the only way I'll get to purchase anything that wouldn't attract a magpie from 16 miles away in a heavy storm. All I can say is, thank all that's wool that the little snot hasn't discovered shoes.

In happier news, look what the mail brought me from Peggy in Georgia, Karen in Utah, and someone else in Utah who didn't give her name (but who has my eternal thanks just the same):

I'm so delighted with all of them. And look what else came, this from Jean in Cornwall:

It says "knit on with compassion and hope, through all chaos", and she sent it because she thought it summed us all up nicely. Well said, Jean. You are absolutely right. I'm off to knit on. And feel the love and compassion and hope of all of you as I do.


  • At 8:10 PM, Blogger Dianne said…

    I'm sticking 2 squares in the mail tomorrow..snail/priority mail from should have by Christmas..~

  • At 10:19 PM, Blogger ~Tonia~ said…

    I so feel for you and the inner child thing. I would like mine to go on vacation for quite a while. Nice purse though. Why is it that they always seem to win?

    The new squares are lovely.

  • At 10:27 PM, Blogger Lynn said…

    There is nothing wrong with that purse. If it were a *real* crocodile, I would have issues, but hide-of-the-nauga in the best color in the world? No problemo!

    Of course, I'm the woman who bought the pink watering can purse about five years ago and didn't care whether it "went".

    Your inner child is welcome here anytime, as long as you understand that both LittleBit and I have OLS [Oh Look! Shiny!]. So there'd be no relief in that quarter.

    Speaking of quarters, check your email, ma'am!

  • At 4:59 AM, Blogger Marianne said…

    I'm with Lynn on the purse issue, I have drooled over red purses ... well...for the longest time (12 years longer than you have, heh) so all I can say is congratulations!

    Ooooh, that EZ bag! LOVE IT!
    Beautiful squares!

  • At 7:09 AM, Blogger Jo said…

    I so love that bag from Jean, I want one, infact I want a t.shirt with that slogan on, my inner child fell in love with a red leather purse last Winter, yours is fun, carry it and enjoy it! I'm working on squares too, will let you know wen they're on the way but we know post to you from here is superquick xx

  • At 3:51 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like your new shiny red purse!

    Great new squares - I better get on the stick (or should I say sticks) and get mine done!

  • At 4:36 PM, Anonymous MonicaPDX said…

    For what it's worth, I *like* that purse. [g] And no, I'd have no earthly use for it, but remember that old hyacinths, soul bit? Word.

    More lovely squares, looking fantastic. And Jean in Cornwall - brilliant!


Post a Comment

<< Home